Mama Magic – the clue is in the name. Written by Grace

Mama Magic – the clue is in the name

The prenatal work

After not having the home birth I had hoped for with my first baby because of her breech presentation, I was absolutely determined that I wanted a HBAC (home birth after caesarean) with my second. I wanted to experience the power of physiological birth and I wanted to feel that overwhelming, surreal sense so many women speak about after giving birth naturally.

Our first hospital appointment was extremely disappointing. A male trainee consultant told us that a HBAC was not an option because it would not be safe, due to the small risk of uterine rupture. I came away from that appointment feeling upset and deflated. As soon as I shared the conversation with Kat, she gently helped me find my way back to myself. She signposted me to articles, blogs and educational resources that helped me drown out the noise and reconnect with what I already felt deep down. That support did not stop there. It carried me right through to the birth of our little girl.

During the second half of my third trimester, Kat became such an important part of helping me feel capable, prepared and calm enough to have the home birth I wanted. During home visits, she equipped me with knowledge about what to expect and shared positive experiences of home births she had attended. She guided me in making sure we had everything we needed for the day, both physically and emotionally. She even came with a bag of goodies to support me once contractions started, including the wave comb, which I barely put down for almost 18 hours.

I attended two events at the local hospital, a “Meet the Midwives” and a birth preparation session. Every time I mentioned that Kat was my doula, they sang her praises. That meant a lot. It was so reassuring to hear how positively they spoke about her and the relationship they had with her. To feel part of a team of midwives and a doula all working in harmony was something I had never really heard of before. In fact, from women I knew through my first birth, I had mostly heard about tension between the two roles. With Kat, it felt completely different. It felt safe, respectful and genuinely supportive.

Birth support

When contractions started at 3am, I was able to phone Kat straight away. She immediately put me at ease, explained what was happening and told me she would come to our house as soon as I felt I needed her. She was never pushy and never intrusive. She followed my lead and gave me exactly what I needed, exactly when I needed it.

At around 3pm, when contractions began to feel just that bit too intense to manage without more support, Kat came to us, and the moment she walked through the door I felt calmer.

There was something about her presence that made me feel held.

She gently guided my partner, Alex, in how to use counterpressure on my hips, which made contractions feel a little more manageable. When he was busy setting up the pool, Kat stepped in with hip squeezes and steady encouragement. Later, when I got into the pool and endured the final few hours of what felt like a never-ending labour, she stayed calm and constant beside me, holding my hand when I felt I could not carry on any longer. In those moments, her gentle touch, her soft voice and her calm presence were everything. Even in the agonising pain, I felt safe. I felt supported. Between her and Alex, I felt like someone was carrying me through it when I was not sure how I could keep going.

Kat worked alongside Alex and the midwives during Alana’s birth, and each role

complemented the other beautifully. The atmosphere was everything I could have wanted: peaceful, quiet and, most of all, kind. Everybody in the room held space for the life-changing experience that was about to happen in our first daughter’s playroom. It is still surreal to think about now. There was such tenderness in the room, and Kat was a huge part of that.

The photography

Choosing Kat’s photography as part of our support package was one of the best decisions I made. Although I often saw her camera, I was never really aware of her taking pictures during labour. She moved so naturally through the whole process, following her intuition about when to quietly capture a moment and when to be right by my side.

She got that balance right every single time.

I now have the most meaningful photographs: raw, emotional and powerful all at once. They capture moments that already feel like a blur, and yet meant everything. They are pictures I will one day share with our little girls, to show them how incredible physiological birth can be.

They also remind me of my own strength and of what can happen when you trust your intuition and inner wisdom.

I was also so pleasantly surprised when Kat brought her camera to our postnatal session to take some pictures of Alana. These have turned out to be the most naturally beautiful photos of our little girl in those first few days of life. Again, they are memories I will treasure forever.

Postnatal support

Kat is the gift that keeps on giving.

Mere hours after Alana’s birth, she emailed me a

beautifully written blog about her experience of attending it. It is something I will print and read over and over again, because it brings me right back to that day in a way I cannot fully put into words myself. It reminds me of my strength, of the beauty of the birth and of what happened in the first home my partner and I shared. To have that experience reflected back to me through the eyes of someone who was such an important part of it means more than I can say.

Kat’s support did not end when the birth did. She was also the person who first let us know that Alana had tongue tie. She put us in touch with a private clinic in the North West and recommended local osteopaths so we could get Alana the bodywork she needed. In those early newborn days, when everything feels so tender and overwhelming, having that guidance was invaluable.

Kat is more than just a doula. She brought warmth, steadiness, wisdom and real care in to one of the most vulnerable, life-changing experiences of my life. She helped me feel informed when I had doubt, calm when I felt overwhelmed and safe when I was at my most vulnerable.

She believed in me and in the birth I wanted, and because of that, I was able to

believe in myself too.

I will always be grateful for the part she played in bringing our little girl into the world, and for the way she helped me feel held, supported and deeply cared for throughout it all.

A Village of Support

Grace’s journey is a stunning example of what is possible when a woman is surrounded by a true "village" of support. Her successful home VBAC wasn’t just a result of her incredible strength, but also the seamless collaboration between myself, the wonderful Eden Home Birth Team at Leighton Hospital, and the specialists who supported their postnatal recovery.

Having a network of support for all things pregnancy, baby, and you is something I will always advocate for. If you are building your own team, I can highly recommend these fabulous local providers:

• Tongue Tie Support: Tongue Tie Northwest

• Postnatal Bodywork: Sian Steel at Stride Clinic

• Local Resources & Community: PBY Cheshire

Grace, thank you for these beautiful words. I will treasure them forever, along with the memory of your amazing birth journey.

If you want to explore some "doula magic" for your own birth, drop me a message for your free discovery call today!