“We do not need magic to transform the world. We carry all power we need inside ourselves already” - Jk Rowling
This blog post is written by Ellie, Josh and Kat (Mama Magic)
Ellie and Josh were provided with a doula package from mama magic for Hypnobirth refresher, birth planning session, labour and birth support and postnatal support Package.
Baby Harry is the 2nd baby for parents Ellie and Josh, He is a rainbow baby.
Charlotte is his big sister and is 2, she's a fabulous little girl who has enjoyed some of the doula visits and preparing for her baby brother. Ellie really liked the idea of a busy bag.
Due to my early years experiences supporting transitioning for siblings is something I enjoy being able to support. I have many ideas to support the adjustment period and a good understanding of child development.
Bump painting, Busy bag and big sister gifts, stories about birth and babies and matching cord tie and bracelets. (from heartstrings)
At around 20 weeks I contacted Kat- Mama Magic because I had started to think about the birth experience I wanted to achieve and I knew Kat would help me get this.
During the pregnancy we discussed hypnobirthing, birth environments and birth plans, we explored fears and ways to encourage labour naturally, what's app support was on going and helped questions be answered between visits. I also explored scans and the midwifery options available. We also Linked with nice guidance and recommendations from grow.
I feel everything included Josh and he was at ease with me and also able to contact me as needed. He really did support Ellie and want to be involved with the visits, I think Josh definitely benefited from doula support as well. He also always made me a good cup of tea when I came to visit, and joined in with the conversations.
I also used the brains acronym to help them find their own answers and advised certain questions that need to be talked over with the named Midwife Ellie and Josh had care from the Oak team, a local home birth team giving continuity for the family. Ellie says she enjoyed the care from the same midwife and this made a big difference also enjoying some home visits. Sadly the named midwife was on holiday the day Harry was born. She got to see her named midwife on day 3 for feeding support and a baby weigh. She found this service and support really helpful and speaks highly of them.
Ellie says the first 12 weeks were extremely difficult due to the previous loss she felt very worried and paid for a number of private scans for reassurance, she says she lost faith in her body. Also during this time the world was facing a global pandemic, making appointments harder. The 12 week scan was horrendous Ellie remembers as she had to go alone and Josh was waiting in car park for news.
“ I was Exhausted for the first 12 weeks and during a lockdown I was at home with my toddler alone as Josh was working.” Ellie found it hard not being able to go out and mix this also made Charlotte extra shy, especially with new faces, we worked to get her used to me and she was soon happy to see me.
“I found the 2nd trimester easier and I was more relaxed and enjoyed the first kicks and finding out the gender”
“The 3rd trimester came with some worry about baby’s size and I talked it over with Josh and Kat, I decided to have faith in my own body. “
“I declined my scans and trusted in the process supported by Josh”
Hypnobirthing bunting full of positive pictures, quotes and things that filled Ellie with happiness, made by all the family.
Josh says the hardest thing for him was the constant reassurance to support Ellie and not come with any basis when making decisions ” I feel men don't have the same instincts as women and my role was to support Ellie.”
“During the end of my pregnancy restrictions started to ease and I was able to have a small baby shower in my mother-in laws garden, family coming together is very important to me. This helped me feel supported and everyone could be involved and start to bond with Harry.”
During the baby shower Ellie was given beads to make a bracelet she wore from 38 weeks until about a week after Harry was born and now safely in his memory box. "These reminded me that people were thinking of me and that Harry was important to them.”
During the run up Ellie had experienced lots of on and off movement, tightening's ,she had a show nearly 2 weeks prior to birth.
“Which made me think I was going into labour, nearly every day for the last week I felt today would be the day.”
As her last baby was born on her due date, Ellie did think this one would come around 39 weeks. We explored all the tips and tricks to help labour begin. What's app support was always used well helping reassure normal process of labour.
I noticed the rest pattern before labour progressed and as the day went on Ellie rested, walked eat and managed well with the tens she kept in contact with me. I also rested and eat pasta! Ellie had prepared and used hypnobirthing to support herself.
Ellie says “Contractions started at 3am, every 10 mins until the morning they were quite intense. I had a Bloody show first thing aswell”
“They then Fizzed out through the morning. I was getting the odd one but nothing in a pattern. I Managed to have a short nap and get plenty of rest. Went for a walk around the block with Josh mid afternoon and contractions ramped up 2 in 10 mins so I put the tens on and breathed through them. Called midwives and Kat at 6pm, midwife arrived at 6.15 also called Cat, followed by doula Kat. I felt calm and in control breathing and moving around them with josh. “
I got a call from Josh just as I was eating my tea saying the Midwife was coming and “would I like to come and do my thing”. Ellie was using Tens and having 2 in 10 mixed surges.
I arrived at 18.33 to find Ellie breathing through the surges well with a smile on her face, it was very hot on that day and warm in the house. The midwife was with Ellie.
We all chatted and laughed. Josh was busy filling the pool and supporting Ellie.
I recommended some swaying and helped with breathing tech. I kept recommending some eating and drinking for Ellie and Josh. Ellie went upstairs for a wee with Josh and after the next 2 surges which were more strong got into the pool.
“Ellie says she remembers feeling worried that taking the tens off and getting in the pool would make things more intense but it didn't, it was so relaxing.”
“At 7pm I got in the pool, I found water helpful and slipping the Lucozade isotonic sport. 7.30 went through transition suddenly became much more overwhelming, I was vocal, found support from Josh very helpful, I also started gas and air. I had a sudden intense urge to push and the baby’s head emerged but the body wasn't born in the next contraction. The midwife asked me to move to standing up one leg on the edge of the pool feeling of intense determination and he was born with one final push at 7.54pm. I lifted him up and then we sat down and relaxed in the pool. Their Placenta followed roughly half an hour later. Harry latched during this time first breastfeed. I was Checked over and had a graze, I was left snuggled up in bed after a shower and the first wee(which was worse than giving birth) feeding Harry.”
Ellie got some strong surges and requested some Gas and Air, she was really in her zone, she also felt a pop with one surge but the water was clear so no concern, Midwife wrote notes and listened in. I felt things were ramping up and Ellie had changed. She was ready to push 2nd midwife was on route. Ellie pushed her baby's head out in the pool and after a few more surges and pushing his whole head was born but didn't seem to move much more, the midwife suggested she moves and has a leg up. I helped Ellie move and reassured Ellie that this is ok and he's coming. Harry was fully born at 7.54pm and back into the pool with a short cord and a baby covered in thick vernix.
Breastfeeding was started not long after birth.
Ellie remembers how well she just breathed through the surges and feels she isn’t good with pain as a person but coped until transition well.”
“Josh is proud of his wife and what she achieved he never doubted she couldn't do it, bodies are made to do it” his top tip is kneel on a pillow by the pool as its hard on your knees, this time wasn’t as bad as last time he says mainly because it was a shorter birth.
Ellie and Josh feel they have had 2 positive birth experiences and would recommend home birth to anyone. It is just a life event, not a medical event.
One happy little family looked at each with pride, joy and amazement. I sucked in my tears, and grabbed my phone to get the pictures for them.
Normal post birth and baby checks were done, breastfeeding started , 2nd mw and student came, all worked to keep the darkroom and the environment relaxed, they were really nice to me and helpful, they respected all Ellies wishes. I feel we worked as a birth team to give Ellie and Josh the space needed.
I felt very Intune with the couple and supported them to have their wishes met. After everyone had left I supported Ellie's first wee and shower. Gave some feeding support feed, made toasts and drinks and tidied up I tucked them all up in bed and was home by 11.10pm.
Driving home with a birth high and a glow of what an amazing experience it was to support that beautiful family.
She rocked that birth!
During the weeks that followed feeding support and emotional support was given to the family. I'm so sad to be saying goodbye to them they have been a real joy to care for.
Ellie is breastfeeding well and has found local support. She is now a mum of 2 and settling into the new role with a smile on her face and super relaxed and confident. Breastfeeding well and has a happy healthy baby boy.
“Ellie and Josh have adjusted to life as a family of 4, being a family unit has important to us. We have always wanted children.”
During the visit both Josh and Ellie thanked me again and explained why they valued my care for them, Josh also spoke about how people don’t know what doulas are or what they do. They would both recommend the support of a doula because the piratical support is really valuable and important. I think the birth experience that Kat helped us create was exactly what we wanted. Kat gave non basis reassurance. After a loss this was even more needed. It was also an advantage that Kat was coming from a non medical point of view. Getting support off someone you feel genuinely cares for you and your family.
Hypnobirthing sessions and doula packages www.mamakat.co.uk
personalised bag from ebay
Cord ties :
Oak Team Leighton hospital :
Due date / birth rights website.